Sometimes, (and by 'sometimes', I mean the many times in which I'm sitting about just contemplating life or writing an essay, as well as the off-chance that I'm actually in the middle of working out or some other intense activity,) I suddenly stop doing whatever I'm doing, and feel like time is standing still, and everything around and within me has stopped moving, and the only thing that continues to run is the train of thoughts in my mind.
And then I feel like my soul is emerging out of my body, and I'm watching myself, criticizing everything I have going on in that moment in time, from what I chose to wear that day, to how high my expectations are for tomorrow, from how yesterday's actions have changed me for better or for worse, to how what I'm doing at that moment in time is relevant and beneficial in the bigger picture called my life.
This out-of-body experience only comes about when I have too much to remember at one time. It's kind of like an automatic system reboot that follows a system overload to prevent it from overheating. I just felt like that a while ago. And I feel the weight of the world on my shoulders right now.
Too often, I burden myself with too much to handle - and I spread myself too thin and end up with a couple pieces of very bland toast. A very good example of this is how I say I will blog everyday, but actually don't because I want to catch up with some television shows. However, I'm still not up-to-date on those because I have some work for university to get done. And I haven't gotten that done yet because I have some personal networking to do on Facebook - catching up with long-time-no-sees and photos to "like" and leave a "comment" under. I haven't got round to that because there are TV reviews to read. I haven't gotten round to that because there are webcomics to catch up with.
But my music playlists need serious updating. And a friend told me to check out this new anime series. Wait, my cousin asked me to read this book. And this other friend told me to watch a series of videos on Youtube. Now, I'm hungry. Now, I feel dirty, let me go take a shower. Now, I'm sleepy, I'm going to go to bed.
Oh, shit, 7am already?
Darn it.
...I didn't get to finish yesterday's blog post.
I seriously need to get more organized.
Or maybe I should throw away some parts of my life.
I don't want to, though. I wish I was more high-powered. I wish I did things more efficiently. There never seems to be enough time in the day...
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