"If you're going through Hell, keep going.": 59

About Me.

Background

My name is Michael Rivera and I am a Filipino-Chinese, 18-year-old student living in Canterbury, but originally from Hong Kong. My parents divorced when I was two, and when I grew up, there were two sides of me: the wild, outdoorsy, gutsy side, and the conservative, intellectual, scholarly side. I spent two years living beside a beach in the countryside. It was then that I learned how to swim, how to fish and how to ride a bike. I love the outdoors, especially when having barbecues and hiking. Outside of that time, my more studious side of me reads, writes, and has a great interest in a broad range of subjects including: television and film, travel, anthropology, human cultures, linguistics, food and drink, psychology, philosophy, literature, forensics, Greco-Roman mythology, European history and politics, South American culture and geology. My deepest love goes to, well, my best friend. But the love that exists just a tiny fraction below that amount of love goes to television series, beautiful beaches, lime margaritas, and books considered classics.

Feel free to e-mail me if you have anything you want to share, suggest, criticize, inquire or comment on! :D

E-mail: scylla.michael.charybdis@gmail.com

(Click this sentence to see my complete profile.)

I went out drinking again.

I don't know what to say, because I don't know what happened. I just want to sleep my troubles away, like many people do, but I know I will have to face the consequences of my actions tonight.

However, I love the dancing, and some selected drinks.

I miss my best friend. I wish he was here right now.

He would know what to do.

I love him too much for my own good.

I've lost so much in the past few weeks. I want to look toward my parents and my class for some sort of light, some sort of guidance, because they are the people I'm obliged to be with.

On the other hand, they disappoint me, they hurt me, they piss me off.

Am I expecting too much? Am I too susceptible to insult? Am I too emotional?

Yes, yes and yes.

It doesn't matter.

It all doesn't matter because next year I won't even be here anymore.

I don't just mean in a physical sense.

My personality - I'm radically changing it when I go to university.

Even if you come back to me, even if you regret it, you won't find me there.

I'm gone.

7 comments:

Madame DeFarge said...: Don't change too much, please. If you're coming to UCL, I still expect to take you for a hot chocolate, my traditional cure for everything.

Just take care of yourself.; March 6, 2009 at 9:21 PM
Jean Tan said...: I just hope you will come up with the right decision. :)

Good luck on everything. :); March 6, 2009 at 11:12 PM
gaf85 said...: My dear friend, alcohol creates more problems than it solves.Talking about your feelings via your blog and all the wonderful people that enjoy reading you and leaving comments will continue to offer support and encouragement.; March 7, 2009 at 3:55 AM
Linda S. Socha said...: ARe you there Michael?
Linda; March 7, 2009 at 4:12 AM
Michael said...: Madame DeFarge: It was a difficult night, I'm better now. Still would like to try that hot chocolate, though.

Jean: Thanks for the wishes.

gaf85: Yes, I know. Alcohol is strange, its effects go from good to bad to good to bad alternatively each time. It's strange.

Linda: I'm here, I'm here. Just been busy.; March 8, 2009 at 2:57 PM
Anonymous said...: I'll take you for dinner if you come over! ;)
why would you want to change your personality? I think it's pretty great right now!

xx; March 9, 2009 at 10:39 AM
Michael said...: Vivienne: I'm excited about it.; March 13, 2009 at 2:06 PM