103 - On my big dreaming

I've been thinking about getting a Twitter account, but am not entirely sure if I'm up for it. There's a lot of ideas brewing in my mind at the moment, and I think I want to list them all out just so I can then focus on what I want to do. So here it goes:

My profile
I don't like my profile. I don't know why. I'll have to perhaps wipe it all off and start on a clean canvas just to paint the perfect picture I want.

Do you hate it too?
I need to keep posting daily, and I need to sign on to more blog directories and communities (like Twitter). I might possibly do a slight reformatting as well, but nothing too drastic, just maybe add a few more widgets and fun stuff on the side bars. As for The Book, I will need to start picking out fifty posts, what I reckon would sell to consumers everywhere, put them in a single word document, do a bit of editing and formatting. I need to pitch a concept for the cover to my best friend, who is quite skilled in the world of photography and graphic design. My other close friend might also be interested in writing a foreword for me. [To-do reading: the publishing process, marketing and advertising, how to work together with your mom, how to be even funnier]

"If you're going through Hell, keep going."
I sometimes feel like this blog is a bit of a mixture of loads of different blog themes put together. Sometimes, I talk about my travels, sometimes I talk about my past, sometimes I talk about my feelings, and sometimes I just post up a Youtube video. Despite the versatility, I feel that it's not really encapsulating my whole self - I still don't talk about the TV shows I watch, the anthropology course I study, the books I read, or where I want to go in the future. In the end, I meant for this to be about my daily life, and it's just really difficult to stay focused on that, when everything else also occupies my mind. Which is why my solution is going to be...

Anthropology blog
I've been doing quite a lot of reading since I've been here in university, and it's starting to get on my nerves how long it's taking me to actually announce the commencement of this blog. The problem is that I just haven't sat down yet to get started on posting anything on it, and well, now I'm pissed at myself, to be honest. So, I vow to post something on there this weekend, because it has to start some time. And if I just can't be bothered, I know I'll be guilted into doing on Monday morning, I'm sure of it. [To-do reading: nature of anthropological study, history of mankind, Sicilian women, the Kwaio, the Azande, loads of other societies...]

Youtube blog
I have a good friend who lives in Hong Kong, and whenever I ask her what she's doing, more often than not, she's going on Youtube. I, myself, have found a lot of funny, intriguing, thought-provoking videos there, and I thought it would be a good idea to start a blog with this friend of mine. Together, we find one video to post on it everyday, and whoever found the video will briefly talk about why it's worthy of your attention. I'm quite excited about this, but with our schedules, we said we would officially release this blog in mid-February. But anyway, just something to think about for now. [To-do reading: video-sharing rights, joint ventures]

Television blog
I felt like I wasn't being myself with that television blog I started, and consequentially, shut down a couple months back. I was being forced to write about everything when I didn't want to, I wrote reviews for some reason. What I really wanted to write about instead was about the thoughts that TV shows provoked in me, because writers put forward ideas that sometimes make quite an impact on the way I think after watching them. I'll try and get to reopening that one around the holiday season, 'cause I was quite unhappy that that didn't work out the first time.

Travel blog
When I turn 25, my best friend and I are leaving our lives behind to travel the entire world in all its power and beauty for however long it takes. We mean it when we say we'll do it, and everything we're doing in the next seven years is to make that voyage possible. We're learning languages, we're doing a lot of reading, and we're only in university, and soon to be working, so that we can earn money to give us steady beginnings as we get accustomed to the traveler's life when we first set out. In my reading, I've been finding a lot of interesting things about how to prepare for such a trip, and information on a lot of places we might want to visit on the trip. This journey requires a whole lot of planning (seven years worth of it), so perhaps compiling them in a blog as a pre-world trip logbook might interest some readers? [To-do reading: travelogues, other world trip experiences, travel destinations]

Hm. I feel a bit better now, 'cause all of that was getting difficult to keep in my head. All six blogs, I have passion for, but I'm a tad concerned about whether I can handle it. Somewhere in my heart, I know that the hard work will pay off, and that this is one of those things that I'm meant to do in this stage of my life. I play no musical instruments, and I do no sports - this is my talent, and I have to embrace it. All I can do is hope for personal fulfillment, recognition and happiness, so might as well hope for more... might as well dream big.

91 - A new blog on its way (Exciting!)

Hello everybody out there, how are you?

There are prospects for an additional blog to my current two, and I'm really excited to tell you about it right here, right now! :D

If you're not already aware, I have moved to Canterbury, England, to study anthropology, after having lived in Hong Kong for all my life. Anthropology, put simply, is the study of humanity, in terms of its origins, and the social relationships amongst human beings. It's a very interesting course, and encompasses elements of many other subjects such as history, geography, sociology, evolutionary biology, economic and political organization, linguistics, kinship, primatology, law, religion, archaeology, and many more.

For a portion of my course, I am required to keep an anthropological diary to aid me in my anthropological studies. This means that every week, I must produce some sort of updated material on what I have learned in my courses, etc...

I was thinking that perhaps I could start a blog that was strictly to do with anthropology. This would really boost my mark up because I know that a lot of people in my course aren't accustomed to keeping anything blog-like in nature regularly. I hope to find something interesting about different cultures every week, and hopefully, by showing you something about a different social group every week, we will all gain something from this exchange. (I am also going to be pressurizing myself even more to work harder at my blogging everyday. I need the pressure. Pressure, pressure, pressure, come to Papa~)

(That was weird.)

I must thank one person before I start checking out all of your fantastic blogs, though, and that person is Argentum Vulgaris, who has had a part in inspiring me to actually do this with his blog, Tomus Arcanum. Every time I go on that blog, I always find something there about various societies and cultures, especially when I dig deep into his archives - he also has Astray in a Latin World, Paused in Peru, and Beyond Bolivia - great blogs strictly on South American people, all of which I also am inspired by.

I think that's enough for now. I will hopefully release my new blog within the next two weeks. There will be stuff on the Neanderthals, orangutans and gorillas, gruesome diseases and cancers, commonalities amongst all human beings (there aren't that many!), genetic drift, different spiritual beliefs that stretch from the Australian Aboriginals, through the dozens of different Indian faiths, to the Congolese communities that believe in witchcraft and spirits of nature.

It's going to be great!

90 - A chance at love

University is a whole mess of food, drugs, music, sex, relationships, friends and strangers, laughter and tears, kissing and drinking, dancing and groping, randomness, and a little four-letter word, namely Love. It happens rapidly, it happens to just about anyone, it happens everywhere we go, especially in university where all of us have left our homes and our respective high schools, to have a great time, to take hold of the responsibility of taking care of ourselves, and to find what makes us happy - whether it's in terms of our academic interests, the clubs and activities we have a desire to participate in, the careers we have dreamed of all our lives and finally are able to pursue, and of course, the chance to discover like-minded people in an environment that's specifically designed and used for an integrated timetable of education, employment and entertainment, together amongst a diverse deluge of young, passionate, and fun-loving people, from around the world.

Finding like-minded people can be an intricate process for a lot of people. Some people have no problem falling into the arms of another upon meeting them, the fantasy story of love at first sight compels them to simply let loose, float about, and allow the tide of love and life to wash them away wherever the current may bring them.

But for me, it is something of difficulty. It takes a lot of time for me to learn to trust someone. It takes some time for me to get used to people before I can begin to like them. I haven't found someone here after two weeks, but it seems like almost everybody else has paired up already, leaving me the sole soldier on the peripheries of the social circles. I know this is because I am simply not daring enough to take the initiative, to ask people for their names, numbers and perhaps a bit of background.

I wonder all the time, why this has always been the case - why I am not interested in others at first, and I've realized that it is because I like getting the attention first. It makes me self-centered, an attention-seeking kind of guy, and it sort of sucks because I'll never find anyone to be with as long as I retain this problematic attitude.

But I want to be given a chance to be in a relationship with somebody. It has been so long since I have been, and I wonder if it has changed. I love the feeling of devotion, and the pride in being somebody's #1, in being loyal, in being one of a pair, in being ______ and Michael together.

I hate seeing everybody getting Facebook-married, I hate seeing them hold hands, I hate hearing them have sex at night, I hate feeling intrusive and out of place when I'm in the company of a couple.

It's going to take some time for me to readjust my position in social interactions, but I've got to make myself a more approachable and gutsy man before I can be deemed dateable. I've got to stop being so self-involved, if I ever am going to get that chance of experiencing falling in love with someone successfully again.